No matter what, we all experience challenging times, but have you ever noticed how often we ask God for help almost as a last resort after we have explored all other options? Why are we not seeking God’s help first, with full confidence, and with joy, rather than look for solutions on our own until we exhaust ourselves?
Oh, The Irony: Considering God As A Last Resort
Have you ever heard someone make this kind of statement:
“I have done everything I can, the only thing left to do is pray”
Okay, what?
Sure, we have all prayed this at some time or another, but when did asking God for help become a last resort after all our other options fail, are we forgetting who our prayers are being heard by?
We are told to put all our anxiety on God because he cares for us, meaning, he wants to help us, we just have to stop seeking our own way, humble ourselves before him, and actually allow him to do things in our lives, even if we do not understand his timing, purpose or plan
1 Peter 5:6-7
Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you
I mean honestly, we sing about being the children of God, reference all sorts of scriptures about how much he will love, strengthen, forgive, and bless us, yet somehow we get selective amnesia, forgetting God is the creator of the universe, capable of solving any, and all problems we could ever face–oops!
Sure, this is funny, but our behavior is the symptom of a more serious problem, as it often reflects how we do not trust God enough to seek his will above our own, whether we realize it or not
“Okay, Like, Seriously, God, I Can Totally Handle This Better Than You”
Even though nobody would say something like that to God if they were standing in front of him, we live that statement all the time, as we do not always submit ourselves to God’s will, especially when it comes to things we really want
When I first came to realize this in my own life, I noticed how little I turned to God when it came to some issues, especially when it came to things I wanted but felt, or knew, he would disagree with
For example, as I was maturing, I turned to him when I had health or financial issues without hesitation, but when it came to seeking his guidance regarding who to marry, not only did I avoid asking for his instructions, I ignored them even when he gave them during prayer as I wanted to date whomever I wanted, rather than wait for someone he picked
Not only did I have an awful attitude about obeying God, but my choices turned out to be complete disasters anyway, as I was seeking what I thought was best, rather than trusting God to do something great in my life if I was patient
However, and it is no surprise, after years of having terrible relationships that left me unhappy and exhausted, I turned to God and said:
“Alright, I understand my desire for a spouse is driven entirely by self-centered, impatient emotions, so I lay the idea of marriage down before you as I am going to put you first, rather than seek a spouse as the most important thing in my life; sorry for wasting all that time”
And what do you know, a few months later, I met my wife Amy, but not because I was frustrated and said “God, please handle this, I am frustrated!”, it had to do with the fact I finally understood just how unhealthy my desire for a spouse was in the first place, and I no longer wanted to put “the hunt” before my relationship with God
Wait, so we actually have to come to God with the right heart in order to receive his blessings?
Yes!
James 4:2-4
You want something but don’t get it. You kill and covet, but you cannot have what you want. You quarrel and fight. You do not have, because you do not ask God. When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures.
You adulterous people, don’t you know that friendship with the world is hatred toward God? Anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God
James openly talks about how we do not receive because we “do not ask God”, but we can also block receiving what we ask for because we “ask with wrong motives”, and then goes on to say that if we put worldly things before our relationship with God, we can actually make ourselves his enemy–pretty direct!
Just like James talks about, when I turned to God and prayed, I did not just say some nice sounding words, I actually meant them as my heart was truly changed, and it allowed me to humbly, and completely surrender the issue, not just finally ask God for help because I had no other options
When we are anxious, impatient, and/or upset with God because a situation is not resolved yet, it shows we are not trusting him fully, no matter what we say, think or pray
Even though I see everything clearly now, what is really awful, is how I did not understand how desperate I was to be validated by someone, nor did I comprehend how this self-centered desire was damaging my relationship with God since I was so obsessed with it, as it brought me to a place where I just did not want to hear God’s advice, which is beyond self-destructive
Now, when it comes to relationship choices, I have heard many Christians say things like “I had to do things my own way to learn about who I am” or “Maybe they are not a Christian, but God wants me to be happy”, which are tremendous lies from the enemy, as there is no scripture in the Bible that tells us we can disobey God, or worship idols we value more than him, as long as it is part of our journey of self-discovery–the total opposite is true as we are supposed to obey regardless of whether we understand or not
Deuteronomy 5:7
You shall have no other gods before me
(Yes, relationships, just like money, jobs, etc… can be idols in our lives when we put them before obedience, and our relationship with God, ie: we rely on them so much, we turn to them for strength, happiness, re-assurance, and our identity)
Ecclesiastes 12:13
Now all has been heard; here is the conclusion of the matter: Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the whole duty of man
Even though the situation with my spouse turned out well, this is a good example of praying to God as a last resort, as I went out of my way to constantly seek happiness outside of his will, but when I decided to surrender, he blessed me right after, your mileage may vary though, it depends on one’s heart, and God’s plan for our lives
The Enemy Works Hard To Make Us Afraid To Trust
It is important to note how the enemy goes out of their way to prevent us from trusting God, as they understand how our lives would change if we trusted God first, as they enjoy the playground in our mind of doubt, fear, insecurity, and selfishness
Even though the effects of not trusting God are obvious, the way the enemy drives us to this point is often subtle, as they hurt us through others, often our parents, close family, relationship partners, etc…, as they know God will not do anything to damage our relationship with him
To illustrate this, one of the main reasons I resisted God for so long about a partner was because I had suffered a lot of abuse as a child, and had become very afraid to trust anyone, let alone authority figures
(God is an authority figure, hello!)
The wounds from my childhood also left a tremendous desire to feel validated, cared for, and physically attractive, as the hurts I carried were so deep, and so influential, they dominated my personality to the point of partially absorbing it–as you can imagine, I was not exactly navigating relationship choices well as a result, shocking!
Even though I knew to trust God, my insecurities were strong, and I allowed myself to be weak, seeking my own path, mainly because I was afraid God would provide someone slower than I felt comfortable with, and my anxiety, loneliness, etc… created feelings I was not comfortable living with
Before I learned to truly humble myself, and trust God in this area of my life, I had gotten angry with him, demanded a spouse because I thought I was being “good”, and said all sorts of ridiculous things, not realizing I was the problem in the first place–double oops!
It took years of effort in order to get to a place where I was fully healed, as I had to let go of the crutches I was holding onto in order to allow God’s work to be made complete in my life, which was scary at first, but God was faithful when I finally did it, I just wish I had surrendered this issue earlier, as it wasted so much time in my life
Okay, so it is easy to identify big issues to surrender like marriage, but what about the situations we experience every day we simply forget to pray about?
This Just In: God Wants To Help Us At All Times, Not Just When We Are Depressed Or Exhausted
Look, up in the sky, it is a bird, it is a plane, no, it is Captain Obvious!
Even though this sounds completely like a “duh” statement, this particular point took me forever to lay hold of, as I often turned to God in prayer when it was convenient, or when I was really stressed out about something, but rarely turned to him in the heat of a moment, which is really when we need him the most
What do I mean?
When facing temptation, I never asked God for help, often choosing to navigate those situations by myself, with, obviously, terrible results
What these repetitive, failosaurus-rex situations taught me, was that it is not in our nature to seek God in prayer as our first response in difficult situations, we have to train ourselves to do it
These situations are not always limited to temptations though, as when we are faced with something particularly tempting, challenging or stressful, it is shocking to note the lack of prayer we exercise in those moments, as we talk a lot about how God is our shield, strength, righteousness, and protector, but we often fail to seek his help in situations like:
- When someone makes us really upset, but rather than ask God for the strength to forgive, and love them in the moment, we allow ourselves to lash out in anger
- If our finances suddenly get unstable, the first things we think about are the consequences we might face, rather than just ask God for his help, and feel so secure we tithe even more
- When we find ourselves attracted to someone we know is wrong for us, but rather than turn to God for strength, we rationalize how it is okay to pursue a relationship so we can be happy or feel cared for
- We see a Christian sinning, but rather than pray for them out of love, we condemn them instead
These are just a few exaggerated examples, but you get the point
Now, by contrast, it is important to not approach God in prayer to “cover our bases”, we should truly be seeking God with firm belief that he is capable, and willing to help us, but we have to also, sincerely, accept his plans may not revolve around solutions we think are best–this is the key to receiving strength, and help from God in all situations, as we often pray for him to do what we want, rather than surrender, and humbly accept what he wants, with full assurance, and confidence he will do something great
Hebrews 11:6
And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him
James 1:5-8
If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That man should not think he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all he does
1 Peter 5:6-7
Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you
So remember, when you are faced with difficult situations, and incidents, ask God for help first, right in the heat of the moment, as it is not like he is unaware of our struggles, we just have to willingly turn to him, with a heart that is committed to surrendering to his will, and, you know, actually follow his advice
Crazy concept!
Matthew 6:7-8
And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him
Luke 6:46
Why do you call me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ and do not do what I say?
If I were to rate things in order of seriousness, I would put this in the top of the list. Look in the churches all over, that is where you will find the most unhappy people. Yes we claim to be happy in God’s house, but in reality there is more fustrations than happiness. The reason for this is that we tend to trust anything else like pastors, churches, church uniforms and pretend to one another by following religious duties, but fail to do the one important thing; Trusting God.